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I am a considerable way toward finishing this polish of A Returning Power. This morning, I have been contemplating query revisions.

And...well. It still all freaks me out. Kind of a lot. After ten years of "someday someone will pay me to write novels!" it's weird to find myself on the brink of taking that first step toward publication. (After "write the novel", that is.) I worry--what if no one wants to represent me? what if I can't tell who the Right Agent is? what if this kind of book just isn't selling right now? what if what if what if. There are so many things to worry about.

I know I'm decent at writing. I know this novel is the best that I can make it without waiting another year to get more distance (again), and that putting it away for a year is probably not a good choice. I also know that those things aren't enough.

I have always been the worst at not worrying about things when there is nothing I can do about them. All I can do, right now, is finish polishing the novel and finish polishing the query and sharpen up my synopsis and pick some agents, even if that means drawing names out of a hat, to send it out to. But I may need repeated kicks on the ankles to get that far.
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Books!

Eon, Goodman: I found the first parts fairly predictable, also some plot turns throughout, but then I have read a lot of YA fantasy; the end became more crashing/cascading and interesting. Probably I will not buy the sequel, but I may well pick it up at the library if I see it.
Lifelode, Walton: Really intriguing book. Neat things going on with tense, nice family dynamics, geographical/magical/sociological divides... yeah. Quiet novel, but good novel. I enjoyed it. (I have been hearing lo far and wide that Among Others is a, out, and b, awesome, but left Minneapolis right before Hugo's got it... maybe the bookstore across the street has it, o forlorn hope.)
Neveryona, Delany: Strange; well-organized; in some ways fascinating as a thing to be read and in others fascinating as a meta-object of reading, both the quotes at the chapter headings and the text itself. The mechanism is transparent; the text is the mechanism; the mechanism is the text. But the text is itself, too. Intriguingly twisty. Possibly not the best thing to be reading after I'd been on a train for twenty hours, but what can I say? It seemed like a good idea at the time. I will keep my eye out for the other Neveryon books.

Book reports written because I am trying to avoid my two current sources of fretting: physics research applications and the fact that I have two short stories out which ought to be coming back to me soon. I managed to do a bit of revision on the general physics statement of interest today, which was nice, and I did request all the official transcripts I need. So that's sort of like progress.

May 2017

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